Monday, 30 May 2016

Funny Merchant Navy Jokes,Quotes,Photos

funny merchant navy jokes

I am a Merchant Navy guy, So I'm Automatically Cooler Than You.
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A newly wed merchant navy sailor is informed by his company that he’s has to join the ship for a nine month contract. A few weeks after he gets there he really starts to miss his new wife, so he writes her a letter.

"My darling," he writes, "it looks like we’re going to be apart for a very long time. Already I’m starting to miss you and we’re constantly surrounded by young, attractive native girls on ports. The temptation’s terrible. I need some kind of hobby to keep my mind off them."

His wife sends him back a guitar with a note reading, "Why don’t you learn to play guitar?"


and he replied "darling i learnt it for u .. iam alwyss surrounded by three people i myself my guitar and your memories from now"

Eventually his tour of duty comes to an end and he rushes back to his wife. "Darling" he says, "I can’t wait to get you into bed so that we can make passionate love!"

But she stops him with a wave of her hand. "First, let’s see how well you play that guitar."
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Funny Pregnancy Jokes,Pregnant Puns,One Liners,Quotes

Below are some of the funny pregnancy jokes,one liners,quotes,pregnant puns

pregnancy jokes

An 18 year old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. 

The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!" The girl picks up the phone and makes a call.

Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their house. A mature and distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of the of the Ferrari and enters the house.

He sits in the living room with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. 

I can't marry her because of my personal family situation but I'll take charge. I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life." "Additionally, if a girl is born, I will bequeath a Ferrari, a beach house, two retail stores, 

a townhouse, a beachfront villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000 bank account. 

If twins, they will receive a factory and $2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?"
At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him, "Screw her again."

Saturday, 28 May 2016

Funny Jokes About Milk With Pictures,Quotes,One Liners

milk jokes

A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk.

The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

He replied, "They had avocados."

(If you're a woman, I'm sure you're going back to read it again! Men will get it the first time)

Friday, 27 May 2016

Funny Malaria Jokes With Quotes,One Liners,Shayari & Pictures

funny malaria jokes

Sirf Dengue or Malaria ka hi to fark hai
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Warrna khoon to rishtedar bhi chooste hai
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macher k katnay se hoo jata hai malaria

wah wah

macher k katnay see ho jata hai malaria

pressure is equal to force per unit area
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Malaria isn’t a problem in the US because Chuck Norris lives there.

Thursday, 26 May 2016

Funny Baniya Jokes,Quotes,Shayari + Pictures You Will Surely Love

baniya jokes

Baniye ki Girlfriend :- Kal tujhe kitne call kiye, lekin tune phone nahi uthaya.

Baniya :- Kyu uthaau, 30Rs. deke jo gana lagwaya wo kya tera baap sunega ??
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Baniya donates blood to santa.
Santa gifts him a car.
Baniya donate again.
this time santa give 1kg BARFI.
Baniya: bas
santa:ab meri ragho me baniye ka khoon dood rha hai.
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Baniya: Yeh kela(banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Baniya: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Baniya:Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de

Wednesday, 25 May 2016

Funny Binoculars Jokes With Pictures & Memes

funny binocular jokes

Enjoy A Hilarious Jokes Collection Of Binoculars


- Jab ACP Pradhyuman Ne Binoculars Se Dekha Toh Woh Bola, "Kuch Toh Hai Wahaan Jo Mujhe Dikh Raha Hai..Daya Pata Lagaao..

- Jab Aloknathji Ne Binoculars Se Dekh Toh Unhe Sanskar Hi Sanskar Nazar Aage..

- Jab Desh Ki Janta Ne Binocular Se Dekha, Toh Usse 'Babaji Ka Thullu' Hi Dikha..

- Jab Daya Ne Binoculars Se Dekha Toh Usne Usse Bhi Tod Diya Kyuki Usme Darwaza Tha...

Funny Jokes On Fevicol With Shayari & Pictures

fevicol jokes
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A friend gives a barrel full of FEVICOL to his friend on his birthday.

what does this friend who receive the gift will sing ???

Dushman na kare dost ne ye kaam kiya hai
Umra bhar ka (gum) hame inaam diya hai.
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Hookah Baar.. Fevicol.. Womaniya.. Ishq Wala Love A moment of silence for lyrics that are murdered every now & then.
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Friendship is like FEVICOL – toote nahin

Love is like cold drink -Ye Dil Maange More

Girlfriend is like detergent – Pehle istemal

karo phir vishwaas karo.

Confidence & Over Confidence Jokes,Quotes,One Liners,Pictures

overconfidence jokes

Height of overconfidence jokes


There was a meeting of Bihar state freedom fighters.

They wanted to free. Bihar from India.

Ram bhaiya raised a point...,

"We may take Bihar from India but how will we develop it?"

Shayam bhaiya had a brainwave. "No problem!

We will attack America, we will lose the war and USA will take us over...

Then we will become a State of USA & develop automatically...!

We will also become direct citizens of USA. No more Visas & Green Cards."

All the Bhaiyas were overjoyed with this solution, but an old bhaiya was not.

Someone asked him why he wasn't happy.

The old bhaiya replied,

"That's all very well....,

"But what would happen if by chance we won & took over America?"
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Height of over confidence..

A man marrying his own secretary thinking she will follow his orders as before.

Washing Powder Nirma Funny Jokes

washing powder nirma funny jokes

Washing powder Nirma

Washing powder Nirma

Doodh si safedi Nirma se aye

Rangeen kapda bhi khil khil jaye

Sab ki pasand Nirma

Kuch bhi Post karo, log padhte zarur hai

Wo bhi tune k saath :)
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the Entire Nirma Team is in Parliament . Hema, Rekha, Jaya aur Sushma
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Pyar karna hai to nirma powder waali se karo..
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.
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. .
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Kyu ki wo kehti hai Pehle istemal karo phir vishwash karo
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You May Also Like
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Tuesday, 24 May 2016

Karan Arjun Jokes,Mere Karan Arjun Aayenge Jokes With Images

karan arjun jokes

'Karan-Arjun' aur 'Achhe Din' bhai bhai hain.
Kyuki Dono ka hi surname 'Aayenge' hai.
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'Mere Karan-Arjun aayenge' is the SI unit of Hope.
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Mere karan arjun ayenge , mere 2nd and 4th saturday ayenge - Bankers
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Famous pairings.

1) Kajol-SRK.
2) Govinda-Karishma.
3) Modi-Amit Shah.
4) Sachin-Saurav.
5) Wasim-Waqar.
6) Karan-Arjun.
7) iPhone-Kidney.

Six Pack Abs Funny Jokes,Quotes,One Liners

funny six pack abs jokes

Dear girls never date a guy with six pack abs, because no one develops six pack abs just to date only one girl.
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I would have six pack abs if I could loose weight buy running away from feelings.

Sunday, 22 May 2016

Funny Tourist Jokes,Quotes,One Liners,Stories + Pictures

funny tourist jokes
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There was a Japanese man who went to America for sightseeing. On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, "Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!"

After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi. Again, the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, "Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!"

And then a Mitsubishi sped past the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, "Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan!"

The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet. And this went on for quite a number of cars. Finally, the taxi arrived at the airport. The fare was $300.

The Japanese exclaimed, "Wah... so expensive!"

There upon, the driver yelled back, "Meter, very fast! Made in Japan!"An American tourist visited a small town in Spain.

There upon, the driver yelled back, "Meter, very fast! Made in Japan!"

Funniest Wifi Jokes With One Liners,Quotes,Pictures

Funny Wifi Jokes

Whats common between
Wifi & Wife ??
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.
.
. .
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.
.
Neighbors Have An Eye
On Both Of Them 

wifi jokes

Just imagine if trees gave off wifi signals, we would be planting so many trees and we’d probably save the planet too.
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I love my wife
wifi*

damn auto correct

Saturday, 21 May 2016

Hilarious Typing Jokes & Quotes With Pictures

jokes on typing

Typing a long text to your crush with your true feelings but then erasing it and typing… Yeah. Ever Happened?
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- Are you upset?

Typing...

Typing...

Typing...

Typing...

- No.
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Person is typing......
Person is typing......
Person is typing......
Person is typing.......
Person says:- hi

Who else hate this
________________________________________________________________

me chatting with girls on fb

Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
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5 mins passed
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Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
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10 mins passed . . .
Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
Girl is typing...
.
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.
.
.
After 10 mins . .

She says: Heyy .

replied bye....

again the same thing happened

Friday, 20 May 2016

Funny Jokes On Sari With Quotes,One Liners & Pictures

sari jokes

In india six inches gap between saree and blouse is divine...

But two inches gap between jeans and top is treated as " Besharam"
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Wife saw sign board.
Banarsi saree Rs.10
Nylon 8/-
Cotton 5/-
Wife: Give me Rs.500
I'll buy 50 sarees.
Husbnd-Surdas ki Amma, istri ki dukan hai.chal aage

World War 1,2,3 Jokes With Quotes,One Liners,Pictures

If women ruled the world there would be no wars, Just a bunch of angry countries not talking to each other.
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WORLD WAR 3

*NEPAL attacks dhoti.10 millions
dhotis killeD

*china supports NEPAL and attacks dhotis.again
20millions dhotis dead

*finally USA attacks NEPAL 1 ant dies in NEPAL

*North korea attacks USA .usa affected a lot in dIs attack

*JAPAN attacks NEPAL another ant died in NEPAL

*RUSSIA attacks JAPAN japan power plants
destroyed

*finally nepal dropS a hydrogen bomb in
INDIA,USA,JAPAN

* ALL 3 countries ouT of da map of world
And Nepal becomes king of world
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"Russian soldier enters Heaven. St. Peter: 'So you're dead…' Russian: 'Oh no- Soviet sources say I'm advancing on the Finns.'

Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Funny Sindhi Jokes,SMS,Sindhi Witty Quotes,Sindhi Shayari & Status For Whatsapp

Get latest and funniest collection of Sindhi humor here.

Jokes on Sindhi surnames

A Sindhi lawyer?:
Case-wani

A Sindhi lawyer after a case?:
Purse-wani

A blue-skier Sindhi?:
Akash-wani

What is a communist Sindhi called?
Lalwani.

What is a Sindhi who falls from the first floor called?
Thadani.

What is a Sindhi who falls from the 17th? floor called?
Kriplani.

What is a Sindhi who falls from the 30th? floor called?
Marjani.

What is the most noteworthy contribution of the Sindhis’ to Hindustani Music?
Raga Kirvani.

A god fearing Sindhi?
Bhagwandas Godwani

A Sindhi painter?
Sadarangani

A Sindhi chef?
Papadmull Kukreja

A Sindhi electrician?
Voltram Bijlani

A fashionable Sindhi?
Jogio Armani

A Sindhi milkman?
Gopal Dudeja

A heroic Sindhi soldier?
Hiroo Sipahimalani

A Sindhi pest control contractor?
Khatmull Marwani

A Sindhi stripper working in New York?
Barbra Jhangiani

A Sindhi fire-engine?
Bhambhani

A Sindhi detergent?
Neelam Rindani

A Sindhi postman?
Mailwani

A forgetful Sindhi?
Bulo Bhulchandani

A fat Sindhi?
Hathiraman

Tuesday, 17 May 2016

Starbucks Jokes,Funny One Liners,Pictures,Puns

starbucks funny jokes

Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, ‘Jesus! This cup is expensive!'
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Starbucks Humor -  in Hyderabad

They opened a Starbucks in Hyderabad.
Waiter: Kya Hona.
Customer: Latte ?
Waiter: Hau Latoon. Ab Kya Hona Bolo.

Customer: Waiter, Cappuccino.
Waiter: Kaiku Doosro Ke cuppa Chinu, Andar Bahot cuppa Hai.

Customer: Ek Mocca Hona.
Waiter: Mauka Sab Ku Hona Life Mein Ek Baar. Ab Kya Hona Bolo...

Starbucks closed.!

Illiteracy Jokes,Funny Quotes,Pictures & Much More To Laugh

illiteracy jokes

Height Of Illiteracy :

You Take A Blade And Write Your Lover’s Name On Your Arm
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And Make A Spelling Mistake
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funny illiterate quotes


A student failed JAMB 5 times. One day, she travelled to visit her friend in UNIBEN, she fell sick & was admitted to a hospital there. She later called her mum & said.
GIRL: Hello ma

MUM: The place is silent, where are u?
GIRL: I'm in UNIBEN
MUM: Wooow finally, thank God o
GIRL: I was admitted

MUM: Thats great o. God has disgraced the witches in ur father's house dat don't want you to go to school (laughing & dancing)
GIRL: Mama na Malaria o

MUM: Malaria is a gud course o my daughter, please take it serious o
GIRL: I would b discharged tomorrow

MUM: God forbid my daughter!!!. U go complete your four years over there in Jesus name.
Girl: God punish Illiteracy!!!
Mum: Amen..... cause i heard that the lecturer is very wicked.

Monday, 16 May 2016

Funny Jokes On Crime Patrol With Pictures

funny jokes on crime patrol




CRIME PATROL me mai ap sbka swagat krta hu

YE EK TRUE incident-hai
isse frwd kijeye taki bharat me
OR KISI BACCHE K SATH aisa na ho
Date 2 July'12.
Jise soch k Insaan ki Ruh tak
kaanp jati hai..

Magar zalimo k hath tak na
kaanpe Mumbai me 18 saal ki ek Masum ladki
jisne abi-abhi 12th ka xam diya tha
Or jo din uske khelne kudne k the Uske sage
Baap
.
Or kamine Bhai ne milkar us
masum .
ko
.
zabardasti
.
. .
"Engineering ka form" Bharwa diya
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Effect of Petrol hike-
Crime Patrol changed their name to Crime Diesel
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crime patrol jokes

Crime Patrol makes you believe that India has the best ever police force in the world!
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I Have Watched Enough Crime Patrol N Saavdhan India To Plan A Perfect Murder

Funny Jokes On Air Hostess With Hilarious One Liners,Stories,Pictures

Air Hostess to Lalu - Sir, are u vegetarian or non-vegetarian?
Lalu: I am Indian
Air hostess: No, No. Sir, are you shakahari or masahari?
Lalu: Hat sasuri! I am Bihari.
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Now the Air India air hostess can say to the Kingfisher one -"Bitch, I may be fat and old, but at least I've got a job"”
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A Pathaan to an AirHostess:
.“Vallah.. Tumhara shakal Humara
Biwi Se milti!”
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Airhostess:
“Bakwas band kar kamine!”
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.Pathaan:
“Masha ALLAH! Zubaan bhi Milti !”

Friday, 13 May 2016

Funny Jokes On Lungi With Quotes,Pictures

Chakali ko Thoda Sa Round Ghumake,
Chivada ko Thoda Sa Tikha Banake ,
Ladu ko Gol Gol Banake,
Aajao Saare Mood Banake
Say All The Laxmi fans,
Diwali....

Don't Miss the Chance,
Diwali....
Chakali Dance,
Chivada Dance,
Laadu Dance,

Chakali Dance......!!
Nashte me jab ye Khane Milega,
On the Spot Khana Padega
Happy Diwali Bolna Padega...
Patake Bhi Fodna Padega..
Say All the Laxmi fan's...
Diwali....

Dont miss the chance,
Diwali....
Ladu Dance'
Peda Dance,
Barfi Dance,
Ladu Dance,
Ladu Dance
Peda Dance,
Barfi Dance....
Ladu Dance

50+ Funny Chuck Norris Jokes,One Liners,Quotes,Pictures

  • When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
very funny chuck norris jokes

  • Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
  • Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
chuck norris one liners

  • Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afraid to move.

Thursday, 12 May 2016

Funny Jokes About Aliens + One Liners,Pictures,Quotes

Funny jokes about aliens

There was a husband and a wife that loved to have sex. They had it everywhere and tried everything.One day they both decided that it was getting old, the same thing over and over again and they wanted to try something new.Later that night a space ship landed outside their window and two aliens came out.

They were husband and wife and were also getting sick of the same thing over and over again too. So the male alien asks the female human if she would have sex with him and she agrees.

Same thing with the female alien and the male human.The male alien and the female human go to the bedroom and the male alien pulls down his pants. 

But the female human sees it and says wtf your c**k is too small,Then the male alien replies,Pull on my ear to make it the size you want. The female human keeps pulling his ear until his c**k is a massive size. 

The next morning the aliens leave and the male human says, How did you like last night ? and his wife answers,it was brilliant the best ive ever had , And you she replies how was your night ? he replies it was the worse night ever all the female alien did to me all night was keep pulling my ear

Wednesday, 11 May 2016

Best Collection Of Funny Family Jokes With Pictures

A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. If one felt it was too hot, the other thought it was too cold. If one said the TV was too loud, the other claimed the volume needed to be turned up. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, the other a doom and gloom pessimist.

Just to see what would happen, at Christmas their father loaded the pessimist's room with every imaginable toy and game. The optimist's room he loaded with horse manure.
That night the father passed by the pessimist's room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.

"Why are you crying?" the father asked.
"Because my friends will be jealous, I'll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I'll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken." answered the pessimist twin.

Passing the optimist twin's room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure. "What are you so happy about?" he asked.
To which his optimist twin replied, "There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!"

Always look at the bright side of things,, dont always look at the downside

Sunday, 8 May 2016

Mother's Day Jokes,Quotes,Funny Sayings,Pictures,One Liners And Much More

Funny happy mother's day jokes

WHAT YOUR MOTHER LIKES

Three sons left home to make their fortunes and did very well. one day, the three competitive brothers got back together to discuss the gift that they were giving their elderly mother. The 1st said,"I built a big house for Mom."

The 2nd said, "I got her a Mercedes with a driver."

"I've got you both beat," said the 3rd."You know Mom enjoys the Bible, and you know she can't see very well. I sent her a brown parrot that can recite the entire Bible. It took twenty monks in a monastery twelve years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000 a year for ten years for them to train him, but it is worth it."

Soon thereafter, their mom sent out her letters of thanks. To the. 1st son, she wrote, "Milton, the house you built is so huge. I live in only 1 room, but I have 2 clean the whole house."

To the 2nd son, she wrote, "Marty, I am too old to travel. I stay home all the time, so I never use the Mercedes. And the driver was rude!"

To the 3rd son, her message was softer: "Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious!"

Saturday, 7 May 2016

Funny Jokes About Packing With Pictures

packing jokes
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Hilarious Jokes About Packing 

Wife is busy packing her clothes.

Man: And where are you going?

Wife: I'm moving to my mother.

Husband also starts packing.

Wife: And where do you think your going?

Husband: I'm also moving to my mother.

Wife: And what about the kids?

Husband: Well if you are moving to your mother and I'm moving to my mother then I guess they must also move to their mother.

Funny Postman Jokes,One Liners,Quotes With Images

Postman jokes one liners

My postman's a right lazy twat!

He added me on Facebook, and posts all my letters to my wall.

Funny Wrong Number Jokes,Conversations,Pranks,Texts,Memes

Funny Wrong Number Jokes

A man at work calls home and his 8 years old daughter picks the phone :

“Hi honey, this is daddy. Is mommy near the phone ?”

“No daddy she is upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.” The little girl quipped.

“After a brief pause daddy says,“But honey you haven’t got an uncle Paul!”
“Oh yes I do, and he is upstairs in the room with mommy right now.” Brief pause, “Uh okay then, this is what I want you to do : put the phone down on the table, run upstairs, knock on the bedroom door, and shout to mommy that daddy’s car has just arrived at the gate.”

“Ok daddy just a minute....”
A while later the little girl comes back to the phone, “Done it daddy.”

"What happened honey ?”
“Well, mommy got scared and jumped out of the bed naked, ran round the room screaming, tripped over,

and knocked her head on the staircase, now she is not moving at all.” “What about Uncle Paul ?” asked Dad.

He jumped out the window into the swimming pool, but I guess he didn’t know you emptied the water last week.

He hit the bottom and I think he’s dead.”

After a really long pause this time...Daddy says,“Swimming pool, but we don't have a swimming pool! Is this 486-5731?” “No, this is 486-5713”
“Sorry wrong number

Friday, 6 May 2016

Arranged Marriage Funny Jokes,Quotes,Pictures And Much More To Laugh

Arranged marriage is-
Like u r walking & unfortunately a snake bites u...&

Love marriage is-
Dancing in front of a cobra & say.
Kaat ..kaat ..kaat

Funny Missed Calls Jokes,Shayari,Quotes,Memes,Pictures

Mobile bana hai har ladki ki shaan,
Miss call karke ladko ko karti hai pareshaan,
Sms me likhti hai miss you meri jaan,
Tumhari aawaz sunne ko tarse hain mere kaan,
4-5 boyfrnd bana kar kehti hain ek tum hi ho meri jaan,
Apne raaz saheliyo ko bata kar karti hai hairaan,
Kehti hain ladko ko ullu banana hai aasaan,
Hosh me aa mere bhai tu inko pehchaan,
Mat pad inke chakkar me ladkiya hoti hai shaitaan.
Boy's Janhit me Jaari.
Naari hai Atyachari..
miss call funny shayari
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miss call jokes

Horror movies don't scare me. 5 missed calls from Mom scares me.
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MISSED CALL

Husband wanted to call the hospital to ask about his pregnant wife, but accidently called the cricket stadium.

He asks, "How's the situation?"

He was shocked and nearly died on hearing the reply. They said, "It's fine. 3 are out, hope to get another 7 out by lunch, last one was a duck!""
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Girlfriend Ki Sister Agar Missed Call Kare To Usse Kya Kahenge….?

Betaaa... Mann Me Dusra Laddu Phoota.
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People who give you a missed call and don't pick up when you call back ,-"Chahte kya ho bhai?
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MEN:

1 MISSED CALL: He thought about you
2-9 MISSED CALLS: he cares
10 MISSED CALLS: he's worried
30 MISSED CALLS: he's horny
50 MISSED CALLS: He is Jobless

WOMEN:

1 MISSED CALL: She likes u
2-9 MISSED CALLS: she missed u
30 MISSED CALLS: she's suspecting u
40 MISSED CALLS: Neva pick or call back, she is pregnant.
50 MISSED CALLS: She's outside ur crib! She gona catch U...Don't pick up.
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Different types of call duration summaries:
----------------
boy to boy !
00:00:59
boy to mom !!
00:00:50
boy to dad !
00:00:30
boy to girl !
01:23:59
girl to girl !
05:29:59
girl to boy !
miss call
husband to wife!
00:00:03
wife to husband
call waiting
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funny miss call quotes

Rajinikanth can give missed call to his own number.
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Also Read
Chicken Jokes
Revenge Jokes
Jokes About Broken Leg
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Wednesday, 4 May 2016

Funny Jokes About Newton With Hilarious Laws,Pictures,Quotes And Lot More :)

Physics would have been much easier if 'Tree' instead of 'Apple' had fallen on Newton's head.
jokes about isaac newton
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newton's laws jokes

Tuesday, 3 May 2016

Unwanted Guest Funny Jokes,Quotes,Pictures

Some unwanted guests knocked our door at lunch time. ....

My wife got worried about lunch and started poking me for my friends untimely arrival as she had only Dal on the stove.

I went to kitchen and gave an idea."When I will ask, what did you cook?
Say, chicken biryani, paneer and daal.

And then go to kitchen and drop a utensil and scream. .
Oh!.. I dropped biryani.

After a while repeat again and say Oh!!! No paneer bhi gir gaya.

And then serve on dal  on the meal."
.
.
.
She agreed to the idea.
.
.
.
"Pamma what did you cook ?"
.
.
She smiled: "chicken biryani, paneer curry and Dal"
.
.
After a while she said,
"Main khana lagati hun?"
And went to kitchen.
.
.
After few minutes hearing utensil drop I asked...
"Biwi, kya hua"
.
.
.
"Oh shit.... sari daal gir gayee"

Monday, 2 May 2016

Funny Jokes About Coffee + Hilarious Quotes,One Liners,Sayings,Pictures & Lot More

"You know you are a coffee addict when you grind your beans in your mouth"

Funny Jokes About All Super Heroes With Pictures

Superman Wonder Woman & Invisible Man Funny Jokes

After fighting some crime, Superman wanted to score some action. He flew over to Wonder Woman's apartment to see if she was available. As he landed on her balcony, he saw Wonder Woman naked on the bed with her legs wide open.

Superman thought to himself, "I'm faster than a speeding bullet; I could be in there, have sex, and be out again before she knew what happened." So Superman did his super thing in a split second and flew off happily. 

Meanwhile back on the bed, Wonder Woman asked, "Did you hear something?"
"No!" said the Invisible Man, "But my arse sure hurts like hell!"

Sunday, 1 May 2016

Hilarious Jokes On Biscuits,Cookies With One Liners,Quotes,Pictures

A banker, a Daily Mail reader and a Romanian immigrant sit down with a packet of 12 biscuits.
The banker takes 11, turns to the Daily Mail reader and says:
'Watch out, that Romanian wants your biscuit!'

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