Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Funny Sindhi Jokes,SMS,Sindhi Witty Quotes,Sindhi Shayari & Status For Whatsapp

Get latest and funniest collection of Sindhi humor here.

Jokes on Sindhi surnames

A Sindhi lawyer?:
Case-wani

A Sindhi lawyer after a case?:
Purse-wani

A blue-skier Sindhi?:
Akash-wani

What is a communist Sindhi called?
Lalwani.

What is a Sindhi who falls from the first floor called?
Thadani.

What is a Sindhi who falls from the 17th? floor called?
Kriplani.

What is a Sindhi who falls from the 30th? floor called?
Marjani.

What is the most noteworthy contribution of the Sindhis’ to Hindustani Music?
Raga Kirvani.

A god fearing Sindhi?
Bhagwandas Godwani

A Sindhi painter?
Sadarangani

A Sindhi chef?
Papadmull Kukreja

A Sindhi electrician?
Voltram Bijlani

A fashionable Sindhi?
Jogio Armani

A Sindhi milkman?
Gopal Dudeja

A heroic Sindhi soldier?
Hiroo Sipahimalani

A Sindhi pest control contractor?
Khatmull Marwani

A Sindhi stripper working in New York?
Barbra Jhangiani

A Sindhi fire-engine?
Bhambhani

A Sindhi detergent?
Neelam Rindani

A Sindhi postman?
Mailwani

A forgetful Sindhi?
Bulo Bhulchandani

A fat Sindhi?
Hathiraman

jokes on sindhi________________________________________________________

Sindhi Punjabi Sardar Jokes

1 sindhi aur PUNJABI ne samundar k kinare Board
dekha jispe likha tha :
.
" DOOBTE KO BACHANE WALE KO 500 ka INAAM "
.
Sindhi : Me jump lagata hu tum mujhe bachana, is
tarah 500 milenge hum fifty fifty kar lenge
.
Ye keh kar sindhi ne jump laga di
.
PUNJABI khamoshi se dekhta raha to
Sindhi ne chilla k kaha : Mujhe Tairna nahi aata
tum mujhe bachate Q nahi ?
.
.
PUNJABI : Tum ne board k niche nahi parah
Niche likha tha :
.
.
" LAASH NIKAALNE WALE KO 5000 KA INAAM "
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A Sindhi opened a Tea stall in China &
Named it". "
"Panju Tea Stall"

He got no business for a long time n was about to close down when some one told him to have a more Chinese Name for his tea stall if he wanted to succeed in China. After struggling for a Name he got grand success

when he kept the New Name.
"KO SI KO SI CHAA FU KE FU KE PEE.'' and his business started in full force
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Bhondu Mal : Munji Joye Mukhe a blank SMS Moklyo Aa

Wandho mal: Cho Bhala ?

Bhondu Mal: Mu Saan Gaalaye Kona thi Na
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A Sindhi comes up to the Pakistan border on his bike. He’s got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard Iqbal stops him and says, ‘What’s in the bags?’ ‘Sand,’ answered the Sindhi. Iqbal says, ‘We’ll just see about that. Get off the bike.’

 Iqbal’s guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains the Sindhi all night and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. Iqbal releases the Sindhi, puts the sand into new bags, 

hefts them onto the Sindhis shoulders, and lets him cross the border. A week later, the same thing happens. Iqbal asks, ‘What have you got?’ ‘Sand,’ says the Sindhi. Iqbal does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. 

He gives the sand back to the Sindhi and crosses the border on his bike. This sequence of events is repeated every day for three years. Finally, the Sindhi doesn’t show up one day and the guard, Iqbal, meets him in a ‘Dhaba’ in Islamabad.

‘Hey, Buddy,’ says Iqbal, ‘I know you are smuggling something. It’s driving me crazy. It’s all I think about…

I can’t sleep. It will just be between you and me, can you let me know what are you smuggling?’ The sindhi, sips his Lassi and says, “Bikes"
________________________________________________________

KHAS SINDHIN LAYI.....

PAPA:-BETA KAL TO MUHINJHE KHEESE MAAN
..........RUPAI YA TA KON KADIYA AAHIN?

BETA:-NA PAPA, MUMMY JO KAM BHALA MAAN
..........KIYAN THO KARE SAGAN.
JAI JHULELAL.
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Funny jokes on Sindhi community


A Successful Sindhi from Dubai walks into a bank in Mumbai & asks for a Rs. 50,000 loan. The bank asks for Security & the guy hands over the keys & documents of his 7-Series BMW which is parked on the street in front of the bank.

After all necessary checks, the bank agrees to grant him the loan.
The bank's President & all officers enjoy a good "laugh" For the Sindhi who used a 1 crore BMW as collateral against a Small Loan of Rs. 50,000

The car was parked in the bank's garage safely.
2 months later the guy returns & repays Rs. 50,000 & the interest which comes to Rs. 1250.
The loan officer says, Sir v r very happy to do this transaction, but we r a little puzzled, while u were away, we checked u out & found that ur a "MULTIMILLIONAIRE", then why did u bother to borrow 50,000??

The Sindhi replies,vari chariya where else in Mumbai can I park my car for 2 months for only 1250 and expect it to be there when I return??

The sindhi smiles & says..
Pleasure doing Business with you all....
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A Sindhi millionaire maintained a mistress in Hong Kong, bought a house (in his own name) for her to live in, plus gave her a monthly allowance of $5,000.
The house cost him about $700,000 in 2005.

He sold the house this year (2012) for $3.8 million after he broke up with that chick.

A quick calculation shows that after 5 years of a fling with the woman, he still had a net gain of $2.8 million plus six and a half years of FREE SEX.

When his wife found out about this, She yelled at him and said...

BLOODY CHARIYA!!
Why the hell didn't you keep two Mistresses!!
________________________________________________________

Mr.Thadani, a middle-aged Sindhi, is on a plane for Hongkong, in a window seat.

Just before take-off, this HUGE Sardar wearing a beautiful suit walks up and sits down beside him.

A few minutes later, the plane takes off.
All is well For a while.

But then, Mr.Thadani realizes that he has to go to the washroom.

That wouldn't be a problem, but he looks over and notices that the Sardar beside him is sound asleep, and Mr.Thadani, being a meek man is afraid to disturb him.

So he figures he'll hold it in till Sardarji wakes up.

But as luck would have it, the Sardar just keeps snoring away, and Mr. Thadani is feeling increasingly more uncomfortable.

After a while, he starts to feel nauseous as well, what from holding it in combined with the plane ride.

He tries and tries to hold it in, but then "AAARRGGHH!!"--he throws up all over the Sardar and his beautiful suit.

He thinks, "Oh, no! Now he's gonna kill me!" and sits there in apprehension waiting for the Sardar to wake up.

Finally, the Sardar wakes up, and finds all this vomit all over him. Mr. Thadani says to him, "Well, do you fell better now?"
________________________________________________________

Ek Bridge ka Tender nikla.
Ek Madrasi ne kaha 30 lakh mein bridge bana dunga.

Authorities ne puchha kaise??

Woh bola:
10 lakh mere,
10 lakh ka material,
10 lakh labour ke.

Sindhi bola:
90 lakh mein bana dunga!!

Authorities ne pucha:
Itna mahenga kyun?? unsure emoticon

Sindhi bola:
30 lakh mere,
30 lakh aapke.

Authorities bole:
Aur bridge kaun banayega??

Sindhi bola:
Bridge Madrasi banayega

Sindhi got the tender...!!
It happens only in India.
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Ek sindhi akhrot bech raha tha

sardaar ne pocha ye khane se kya hota he

Sindhi.::: dimagh tez hota he

Sardar : kese?

Sindhi: Acha ye btao 1 kilo chaawel me kitne daane hote hain

Sardar:: pata nahi

Sindhi ne usko Akhrot khiLaya' or bola,; btayo 1 darzan me kitne keLe(bananas) hote hain..?

Sardar: 12

Sindhi: dekha dimag tez huya na...
sardaar :- han yaar, 1 kilo de do?
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Sindhi on his deathbed.
My wife, where r u ?
Wife: Yes, I'm here.

My sons & daughters are you all here?
Yes, Papa
Sindhi: To phir bahar wale kamre ka pankha kyun chal raha hai ?
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Ek Seth ne Sindhi salesman Rakha..Sales choguni ho gayi..
Seth shop pe aaya toh woh Grahak ko Fishing Rod bech raha tha,

Seth khada ho k dekhne laga,grahak ne 800 me fishing rod kharid liya...
Sindhi bola-Itne mehnge joote pehanke fishing karoge ???

Sports shoe le lo...
Usne 600 ke shoes le liye.Sindhi bola-Dhoop lagegi,ek Cap bhi lo,usne le li.
Sindhi bola-Fishing karte hue bhookh lagegi to kuch khane ko le lo...

Usne chips,biscuit le liye... Woh bola fish rakhne ke liye ek basket le lo, le liya...
Iss tarah uska bill 8000 bana...Seth bahut khush hua bola - Tumacche salesman ho, woh keval
Fishing rod lene aaya tha aur tumne itna saman bech diya !!!

Sindhi-Sethji woh to biwi ke liye "WHISPER" lene aaya tha,
Maine kaha- 5 din kya karega, ja machali pakad jake...!!! xD
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(Sindhi Taxi Driver) : A naked and drunken woman boards taxi in London one night.The Sindhi driver keeps staring, and does not start the taxi.Woman: “Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?”

Driver: “I’m not staring at you lady…........................ Just wondering where have you kept money to pay me
________________________________________________________

Ek dadaji apne chote totle pote ๐Ÿปk sath ganpati visarjan krne jate h
Dadaji(apne pote ko)-jaha kichad aye to mje btana kyuki mere hath me ganeshji h aur me niche nai dekh skta

Pota-thk h....
Wo chalte jate h.....

Pota-Gapti baba...
Dadaji-Morya..
Pota-Gapti baba..
Dadaji-Morya...

Achanak Dadaji gir jate h aur kehte h-Tje bola tha n kichad aye to btana...
Pota-"itni der se to bol raha hu n.. Gap to baaba,,,Gap ti baba,,,taha hi ta chillayo paya tha ๐Ÿปmorya morya. Ta maa sha kaya."

Gap ti baaba ....morya
gap ti baaba ....morya
______________________________________________________

Ek NRI India Ghumne Aaya Aur Usne Tea-Stall Par Jakar Ek Chai Order Ki.
NRI Ko Ek Chhota Ladka Chai Dene Aaya, Jisne Chai Ke Cup Ko Peene Wale Hisse Se Andar Ki Taraf Se Pakda Hua Tha.

NRI Ne Chai Ka Ek Ghoot Piya Aur Bola: “Tum Log Kab Sudhroge? Chai Is Tarah Nahi Pakadte, Ungli Nahi Doobate Chai Mein”

Ladka: “Sahab Ungli Mein Dard Hai,Dr. Ne Senkne Ke Liye Kaha Tha”
NRI Gusse Se Bola: “Chutiye Apne Pichwade Mein Rakh Ungli, Wahaan Sabse Jayada Senk Milegi”
Ladka: “Sahab Abhi Tak Udhar Hi Thi, Aapke Order Ke Baad Nikalni Padi“
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Also Read

Funny Jokes On Bollywood
Vijay Mallya Jokes
______________________________________________________

A Sindhi comes up to the Pakistan border on his bike. He’s got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard Iqbal stops him and says, ‘What’s in the bags?’ ‘Sand,’ answered the Sindhi. Iqbal says, ‘We’ll just see about that. Get off the bike.’ Iqbal’s guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains the Sindhi all night and has the sand analyzed,

only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. Iqbal releases the Sindhi, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the Sindhis shoulders, and lets him cross the border. A week later, the same thing happens. Iqbal asks, ‘What have you got?’ ‘Sand,’ says the Sindhi. Iqbal does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to the Sindhi and crosses the border on his bike.

This sequence of events is repeated every day for three years. Finally, the Sindhi doesn’t show up one day and the guard, Iqbal, meets him in a ‘Dhaba’ in Islamabad. ‘Hey, Buddy,’ says Iqbal, ‘I know you are smuggling something. It’s driving me crazy. It’s all I think about…I can’t sleep. It will just be between you and me, can you let me know what are you smuggling?’ The Sindhi sips his Lassi and says, “Bikes"
______________________________________________________

5 sindhi
and
5 sardar are travelling by rail from Pune to Mumbai.
They gather at Pune Railway Station.

Both groups desperately try to prove their superiority.

SCENE 1 (PUNE-MUMBAI):
______________________________________________________

5 sardar buy only 1 ticket,
and
5 sindhi buy 5 tickets.

sindhi are desperately waiting for TC to come.....

When TC arrives,
all 5 sardar get into one toilet,
so when TC knocks,
one hand comes out with the ticket and the TC goes away.

On the return journey,
they don't get a direct train to Pune,
so both group decide to take a passenger train till Lonavala,
from there they can easily get a Local Train to Pune.

SCENE 2 (MUMBAI-LONAVALA):
______________________________________________________

sindhi decided,
"This time,
we will prove that we are smarter".
5 sindhi buy 1 ticket, sardar don't buy any ticket at all !

TC arrives....

All sindhi
IN ONE TOILET.
ALL Sardar IN THE OPPOSITE TOILET.

One sardar gets out and knocks the door of sindhi toilet.
One sindhi hand comes out with the tickets,
Sardar takes the ticket and enters sardar toilet.

TC drives out all the sindhi from the toilet,
And they are heavily fined.


SCENE 3 (LONAVALA):
______________________________________________________

Now,
both the groups are at LONAVALA Railway Station. sindhi' are planning their move for a last chance, ... they board the local train to Pune.

This time,
sindhi decide that they will play the same (1 ticket) trick.

ALL sindhi take 1 ticket ... sardar buy 5 tickets.

TC Comes.
All sardar show their tickets,
AND ......
sindhi are still searching for toilet in the Local train!!!!!

Conclusion: Technically intelligent people are geniuses,
don't mess wid sardar's.....
Sardar rocks...!! :-)
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