Monday, 18 April 2016

Funny Cockroach Jokes,Sayings,One Liners,Quotes & Hilarious Images

A cockroach's last words to a married man who is about to kill him:-
"Go ahead & kill me, u coward! U r jealous of me coz ur wife is afraid of me & not afraid of u."
funny cockroach quotes
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Sardar is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and
says, "walk", it walks.

He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, "walk" , it walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, "walk...." Finally he wrote the conclusion......

"after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it becomes deaf.
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Salesman: Sir, cockroach ke liye powder loge kya?

Santa Bola:
“Ji Nahin, hum cockroach ko itna laad-pyar nahi karte! Aaj powder laga denge to kal sala DEO mangega!!”

Salesman Fainted !!
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What did the cockroach say to the man who wanted to squash it?

"you're just jealous, because i can make your wife scream louder than you can."
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The funniest life cycle.
Cockroach is afraid of rat.rat of
cat.cat of dog.dog of man..man
of his girlfriend..and and
girlfriend of cockroach
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In the morning, wife asked for newspaper ..

Husband - How backward you are... The world has progressed so much and you are asking for newspaper? Here, have my iPad ....

Wife killed the cockroach with the iPad....

Husband unconscious ...

Moral of the Story:

Whatever wife asks..., GIVE!!
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cockroach jokes one liners

I m also brave
.
.
Until a cockroach starts flying.
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Gujju & Chinese in a train:
A cockroach enters.
Chinese catches it & eats it!
Another cockroach enters.
Gujju catches & asks d chinese:
Kharidega?
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funny cockroach jokes

"Seeing a cockroach on your bed is nothing actually, .
.
.
.
.
. .
.
. .
. .
..
the real problem starts when it disappears !
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Kid to his Mom : Mumma.. Main kaise paida hua..?

Mom : Maine ek box me mitti daal kar rakh di thi, kuch din baad uss mein se tum mile mujhe.

Kid did the same thing...

Jab Kuch din baad usne jaa kar dekha to usme 1 Cockroach tha..

kid (Gussey se) : Dil to karta hai ki tujhe chappal se maar du.. Par kya karu..!? Aaulad hai tu meri...!!
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funny cockroach sayings

A Cockroach To A Young Guy:
"I Can Make Your Girlfriend Scream,
More Louder Than You Can
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Not a joke but, you should read this :)

A beautiful speech by Sundar Pichai - an IIT-MIT Alumnus and Global Head Google Chrome:

The cockroach theory for self development

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady.

She started screaming out of fear.

With a panic stricken face and trembling voice,she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.

Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed on another lady in the group.

Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.

The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.

In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter.

The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt.

When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach
responsible for their histrionic behavior?

If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?

He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.

It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.

Lessons learnt from the story:

I understood, I should not react in life.

I should always respond.

The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of.
A beautiful way to understand............LIFE.
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