Funny Lie Detector Jokes

Lie Detector Robot Jokes

A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. He decides to test it at dinner. He asks his son, "Son, where were you today during school hours?" "At school." The robot slaps the son. "Okay, I went to the movies!"

The father asks, "Which one?" "Harry Potter." The robot slaps the son again. "Okay, I was watching p0rn!" The father replies, "What? When I was your age I didn't even know what porn was!" 

The robot slaps the father. The mom chimes in, "Haha! After all, he is your son!" 

The robot slaps the mother.

Funny Joke Of Wife Working As A Lie Detector Machine 

A man and his wife are driving down the road when a cop pulls them over. The cop says to the man, "Do you know that you were speeding?" 

The man replies, "No sir, I didn't know I was speeding." 

The mans wife then yells, "Yes you did, you knew you were speeding I've been telling you to slow down for miles." 

"SHUT UP!" the man says to his wife, "Shut the hell up, just sit back and be quite." 

Then the cop says, "well, since I've got you pulled over did you know that the tag on your license plate is expired?" 

"No Sir" the man replies, "I did not know that" "WHATEVER!" 

His wife yells, "I've been telling you to go get it up to date for 2 whole months now!" 

"Shut up" the man yells to his wife again! "Sit back and shut up, mind your own business!" Curios, the cop walks over to the woman's side of the car and asks her, 

"Does he always talk to you this way?" 

"No" she replies, " Only when he's drinking!"